My husband Tom and I celebrated our 10-year wedding anniversary by going on a three-day mini pilgrimage to the Grotto of Redemption in West Bend, Iowas. It was an effort to adhere to the traditions and precepts of this jubilee year with hopes of strengthening and recommitting ourselves to the sanctity and mission of our vocation as a married couple in faith, love and fidelity.
Our journey was one of gratitude, joy and solemn reflection on the extraordinary grace of redemption. Walking the Stations of the Cross at the grotto brought us into a deeper discovery of the profound gift of salvation and its redemptive values. We identified more closely with the spirit of Christ and His Church in seeking out His will as a family unit, all along the way threading our thoughts on the crucial role of Mary as our mother, not hesitating to request her guidance and support to live out our vows worthily.
Our lifeline as a couple has been a continuous reception of tile sacraments and a prayer life for us both. Twelve years ago, Thomas and I were inspired to pray about our vocation, being drawn towards family life together. In two years' time we were married in the Church.
Father Peter Feldmeier, who officiated our wedding, spoke wisely in his homily, giving us validating words of action pertaining to the blending of our lives as one unified in Christ by using the mysterious example of how a pure crystal vase is created: by combining sand and lead, and mixing it through an intense fire whereby the two elements are forever infused together, never again to be separated back into sand and lead -- that would be impossible. The example teaches us to live out the sacred joy of unitive love in God's creation of the family.
It has not always been a clear path of light and love for me. As a younger woman caught up in a time of confusion and dismay, I struggled desperately through a challenging past wilere I was earmarked for a major fall. I've been at both ends of the spectrum, so to speak.
In 1976, in a vulnerable state of unresolved issues, and being blindsided by my own co-dependencies during those earlier years, with a reluctant will I "married" a man who was the spitting image of my biological father, an abusive alcoholic type. We were a toxic combination bound for a meltdown.
With no prior marriage preparation or realization of what we so immaturely yoked ourselves into, it was over before it ever started.It was only God, who in His infinite mercy, saw fit to reclaim me as His child, as His lost sheep, as His prodigal son, as His Mary Magdalene.
In a plunging leap of faith, by way of complete surrender, in the darkest hour of my life, I turned my heart directly to God for help, crying out in my brokenness to be "found." He not only found me, I found Him in the healing, 15-month process of an annulment, in the healing sacrament of reconciliation. in the healing heart of Jesus in the Eucharist at daily Mass.
Scripture and the sacraments became instrumental during this powerful, lifechanging course of transformation. much like the way of the cross. A purification, being drawn into His spirit of salvation, a path of sanctification we are all called to.
Only then could I see. many years later at the appointed time. God's plan unfolding, manifesting itself in our positive, nurturing, loving relationship, afforded to us solely by the means of the redemptive graces that are meant for us all throughout our whole lives.
Many couples can be strengthened in their marital union no matter what their difficulties or trials may be. The challenge to overcome them can be won by committing ourselves to the intimate partnership of achieving holiness by seeking out the will of God.
